Once Jess is clearer about what’s going on she can think about what options are available to her.

You can use this worksheet to get clearer about what are your options in your own conflict.

1. Miracle question

What would she like to be different?

  • That the picture be off the internet
  • To not have to be stressed about how people would react to the photo
  • To have her friendship with Anna return to normal

How would she feel?

  • Less embarrassed
  • Less worried about the repercussions of the photos with family friends and employers
  • That she was understood by Anna
  • More confident in her social media profile

What specific things would need to change so that she would know the conflict had been resolved or was being managed well?

  • She would feel comfortable with her online presence or that the photo would be removed
  • Not feel animosity towards her Anna anymore

2. Prioritise

It is important that Jess considers what is most important to her. She might write these things down to be able to reflect on them. She may want:

  • To be confident in the image she portrays online to friends, family and employers
  • To be less stressed about the reactions of her social media network

3. Action steps

What steps could Jess take to assist her in making the changes that she wants to see?

Jess knows that she would feel less anxious if the photo was untagged if not taken down completely. She could work towards achieving this by:

  • Talking to Anna and letting her know how she feels
  • Untagging herself
  • Quitting social media

It would be useful for Jess to brainstorm all these possible action steps she could take and consider the range of options available to her so she can make an informed choice.

Let’s see how her options could fit into the categories of: